Alcoholics think they are sneaky but the truth is they give themselves away whenever and wherever there is alcohol involved. It can be difficult to observe your loved ones with a proper perspective, you know them so intimately, you likely make excuses on their behalf. Try to consider their lifestyle and actions as an outside observer, as if you don’t know their daily habits. If you are unsure that the person you recently started dating may have a drinking problem we have compiled a list of signs to look for.
11 Signs You Are Dating an Alcoholic
1. Alcohol is a part of every celebration.
It doesn’t matter if you’re celebrating a birthday, the birth of a child, a new job or promotion, purchasing a house or even making it home safely, alcohol is the one definite item they will bring. Somehow any milestone will be cause to have a few drinks. And alcohol is the only thing that really remains a constant part of all it.
2. They drink whatever is available.
After payday they may only drink the top shelf stuff, but as the money fades they’ll be knocking back $2 dollar cans of beer like they didn’t know there were better options. Most social drinkers stick to their brand, their “drink” and when it’s not available they usually decline all other offers. A person suffering from alcoholism can go from white to brown liquor, cross over to beer and top it off with a shot of moonshine without missing a beat. For the non-alcoholic, a drink is something that want to consume because they like it, for an alcoholic, a drink is something to consume regardless of if they like it.
3. Alcohol is used as a coping mechanism.
Whether it’s death in the family, a rough day at work, an argument or they’re just in a bad mood, alcohol will be brought into the equation. Alcohol is used like prayer, exercise or meditation to relieve stress. Alcohol becomes a form of therapy. If alcohol is being used to self-medicate, it is a strong sign that there is a problem.
4. Their alcohol tolerance is higher than most.
They can have several drinks without getting intoxicated. You may even start to wonder if their drinks are watered down. One or two drinks can relax a social drinker whereas a person who self medicates with alcohol may need half a bottle or a 12 pack to feel that sensation. Of course, some people naturally require more to drink to achieve a ‘buzz’, but an alcoholic likely has been building a tolerance for some time.
5. Overly emotional when drinking.
While sober they may have an emotional barrier that’s difficult to penetrate but after a few drinks they begin to open up sharing their life story and perhaps a few events you wished they would have remained silent about.
6. Alcoholism runs in the family.
Addiction may be plaguing a few members of the family and sweetie may be able to recognize alcohol abuse in others but not within them self. Pay attention to those relatives who pass out at each family function and their relationship with your sweetie.
7. Drinking when they don’t want to.
You and your date might go out for a night that was not intended to involve alcohol, a night of fun with friends but as soon as sweetie gets there and sees alcoholic beverages, everything else goes out the window. They may even say “I didn’t plan on drinking like this tonight” or “I didn’t want to drink tonight’ but one thing is for certain, the drinks flow on.
8. Volatile or difficult to deal with when sober.
Everything that you do or that is said rubs them the wrong way. Things that you usually laugh and joke about may send them into a rage when sober. You may even find yourself suggesting that you “just have a drink” in hopes they may relax a bit.
9. Always have money for alcohol.
Perhaps they never have extra funds for the upcoming concert, movie release or dinner yet somehow they always manage to have just enough for a drink or two. They may look over the need to get that oil change or the shoes they’ve been speaking of all week and choose alcohol instead. This may bleed over into asking friends or yourself to fund the alcohol tab.
10. Frequent sweating.
It doesn’t take much physical action, even on cooler days, to get their pores to pouring. They may never complain of being hot or being tired, many times they may continue with the previously scheduled activities as if nothing is happening.
11. They’ve had previous run-ins with the law in regards to alcohol.
Perhaps they’ve had a few DUI charges, gotten into fights when drink or have disorderly conduct or public intoxication charge on their record.
So what do you think? Have you ever been in a relationship with an alcoholic? What signs did you notice? If you were the alcoholic what do you think gave you away? Do you want to give them an opportunity to get the help that they need?