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Home > Experience Blog > Expert Columns > Current Unmanageabilty by Peter Marinelli

May 8, 2012 By Peter Marinelli

Current Unmanageabilty by Peter Marinelli

"Peter Marinelli Director of Sober Living "What type of unmanageability are we talking about after the drink is removed?

Anything in our life which is causing me disturbance.

Fear being the main culprit, for from it arises more unmanageability. Fear seems to make its way into every area of our life weather we are conscious of it or not, it’s usually there-we are just asleep to it. When it gets painful enough and we tell ourselves something needs to be done, something needs to change, there comes a sudden knowing that the change must come from within not from without. We surrender to our powerlessness. The realization that our unmanageability is in reality, from within, regardless of what it going on in our external world. Most of us walk with the mantra that when this or that changes I will feel better I will be ok-it’s delusional. If I’m attached to that sort of thinking I’m set up for failure. We spend hours upon hours in our day trying to arrange life by having others do what we want. The mission is to have all our ducks in a row. Yet when one of the areas of my external world changes (not to my liking) it’s back on us again. We’re unhappy thereby trying harder to arrange life to suit ourselves and it becomes a downward spiral. It’s like trying to grab a handful of sand and squeezing it to hold it. It squeezes right out of our hand. We have to hold. Similar to water-cup it gently and we can drink it, grab it and we have nothing.

If we rely on self, we have fear and the mind will look to create more of it, via drama. If we don’t seem to have drama, we will get involved in someone else’s drama, and never ever will we be present with the NOW.

This drama can be easily found out by the amount of internal dialogue we walk around with. If they do this or they better do that or I remember when they did this to me if it ever happens again, when I hit the lottery, if I have enough money, if I don’t have enough money, what if he or she does this or that, my boss, my children – get the point!

Self–confidence and self-reliance may feel good for a while, as we walk around thinking, hey I got it licked, but fear just sits in the back-round waiting to pounce on us as it always does …it jumps out from behind a bush and says gotcha.

Besides, if self-confidence and self-reliance worked, why would we ever experience fear at all? But, as experience has proven to us time and time again fear keeps rearing its ugly head and holds us with a firm grip. When life appears to be going our way, what we ought to do is run to God for thanks and more guidance, rather than waiting (as most of us do) for another challenge to show up then we turn to God please help us with this.

We need to answers questions from a place of past experiences.

Let that be your guide, not the mind, as it will cover up truth. It has to, for is it where the ego resides and every manifestation of self has a room, so it must protect and defend itself from Truth.

Simply put – God could and would if He were sought. Are we seeking?

 

Blessings,

Chop wood, carry water

Peter Marinelli

FHE Health experience

Filed Under: Expert Columns

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About Peter Marinelli

Peter Marinelli, the Director of Sober Residences at FHE Health, shares his passion and insight about sobriety. Peter has been sober over 25 years and has dedicated his life to helping others recover from alcoholism and drug addiction.

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